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deutschland103
New member



Joined: Mar 29, 2009
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 1:22 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Hey everyone! I have a bit of an issue that I'd like to get some help with.

Today I was pulling out of a busy parking lot wanting to make a left, crossing over 4 lanes of traffic. Everything was clear so I sped up and went but there was some dude who was driving fast and didn't stop even though I was clearly in the middle of the road. Now, I know I should've stopped and waited but I went and he had to slam on his brakes and I heard the screeching sound b/c the roads were wet. Nothing happened and I tried not to make eye contact but I saw him and his face said everything...

Now, my issue is, whenever I make a mistake, whether it be a small one that means nothing (ex. rubbing the curb when parallel parking) or like the one I explained above, I breakdown. I start shaking, and think omg I have to change my license plate, etc.... Yea, I get pretty dramatic. But, idk why!!! It really bothers me! Does anybody else feel the same way? Or if you did, what have you done to calm yourself down?

PS. I try and think to myself, nothing happened its okay, but it doesn't really work...

Thanks

DL
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Misha
Site Owner



Joined: Aug 02, 2006
Posts: 705
Location: McLean, VA, USA

PostPosted: Sun Mar 29, 2009 2:44 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Umm, well, you definitely was on the wrong - but you know this yourself, no need to re-iterate Smile

How to deal with that? That's a good question. How do you deal with your other mistakes, not related to driving? Do they cause similar effect? Just from the sound of it I would say that probably yes.

If that is so, looks like you need to figure out why are you doing this. Others can have only clues and tips, the only person who can positively say - yes, this is it - is you. What I can tell you based on my life experience - probably your parents or guardian(s) were quite strict with you and punished you for every mistake you made.

If this was indeed the case, then you have a long and hard road ahead trying to fix your thinking and convince yourself that it is OK to make mistakes, we all do this. Good luck with it Smile
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arun
Driver
Driver



Joined: Dec 25, 2009
Posts: 100

PostPosted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 2:49 pm Reply with quote Back to top

In this situation you knew that it was your mistake , so you should have rather stopped and talked to him out. There are chances that he might report you to cops. but talking it out may end the ordeal.
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suziecat7
New member



Joined: Jan 03, 2010
Posts: 8

PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:32 pm Reply with quote Back to top

When I do somrthing stupid, I usually make a contrite face and mouth "I'm sorry" to the driver I offended. Sometimes they forgive me and sometimes they don't.
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SafeTraveler
Member
Member



Joined: Aug 17, 2010
Posts: 29

PostPosted: Tue Aug 17, 2010 3:14 pm Reply with quote Back to top

deutschland103 wrote:
Today I was pulling out of a busy parking lot wanting to make a left, crossing over 4 lanes of traffic. Everything was clear so I sped up and went but there was some dude who was driving fast and didn't stop even though I was clearly in the middle of the road.

Misha wrote:
Umm, well, you definitely was on the wrong - but you know this yourself, no need to re-iterate

At the risk of angering the site owner, I humbly disagree. (Although correct me if I missed something.) deutschland103 didn't mention any signs preventing him/her from exiting the parking lot to the left across four lanes, so there wasn't any wrong there (unless there is a law about this in other states that I don't know about). deutschland103 indicated that the driver was (1) speeding and (2) would have hit deutschland103 (not the other way around), which places *that* driver in the wrong. At least that's how it would play out here in Pennsylvania. And you would have the right to sue him into oblivion.

deutschland103 wrote:
Now, I know I should've stopped and waited
Most definitely NOT. Do not stop in the middle of a four lane highway! More cars will eventually come and you might cause an even worse situation. Once you saw that the path was clear for you to proceed, you are allowed to proceed with the maneuver. You cannot foresee the speeding driver approaching faster than expected and ruining your plan, which is one of the reasons why speeding is illegal and automatically places the speeding driver in the wrong.

However, I must say that in situations like that (taking a left across four lanes), I highly recommend taking a right and finding a safe way to turn around instead. Yes, this can take time, but it can save your life. Lesson: just because there are no signs saying that you can't do something dangerous, always take the safer alternative anyway. Wasting some of your valuable time is better than losing the rest of it.

Regarding your stressing out when making minor mistakes: it sounds like you need more self confidence. Keep in mind that there are plenty of people out there that aren't perfect, that bump curves and do other forgivable things.


Last edited by SafeTraveler on Wed Aug 18, 2010 1:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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myownworld
Site Admin
Site Admin



Joined: Jan 06, 2010
Posts: 485

PostPosted: Tue Aug 17, 2010 4:35 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Great advice ST. I completely agree.

p.s. I'm always bumping curves! Sad
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SafeTraveler
Member
Member



Joined: Aug 17, 2010
Posts: 29

PostPosted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 1:25 pm Reply with quote Back to top

deutschland103 wrote:
Now, I know I should've stopped and waited

Hmm, perhaps you meant that you should have waited before turning out into the road? I don't see how that would have worked either. The other driver wasn't visible yet, or was at a safe distance away (assuming a legal speed), thus you would have been waiting for nothing.
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